Coach’s journal · Feedback & growth
A place to begin
Hesitation may reflect a wish to protect the relationship. Acknowledge that care, then prepare to discuss the observed behavior, its impact, the other person’s view and a next action to try together.
When care becomes hesitation
You know which moment needs a conversation, but starting feels difficult. You worry about upsetting someone or seeming demanding. You decide to wait and quietly correct the work yourself.
What might the other person be experiencing? They may not know there is a gap, or may be guessing what you expect. There is room to discover what each of you understands.
What relationship do you want to build?
Alongside a goal of giving useful feedback, consider the relationship you want: one with respect, room for difficult conversations and opportunities to grow.
What would a conversation consistent with that relationship sound like? Could you be clear about your perspective while remaining curious about theirs? Your care can help you begin.
Separate observation from interpretation
Write down a specific behavior and its impact. Move from “they are irresponsible” to what was missing, when it happened and whose work was affected. Note what you do not yet know.
Ask how the person saw the situation. Explore an action to try, support they need and a time to review. Invite them to describe the agreement in their own words.
What HR can notice beyond frequency
Alongside the number of feedback conversations, explore whether leaders had room to listen and time to follow up. A useful question is what the two people learned about each other’s expectations.
Questions about this topic
Where can I begin?
Hesitation may reflect a wish to protect the relationship. Acknowledge that care, then prepare to discuss the observed behavior, its impact, the other person’s view and a next action to try together.
Do I need to change everything at once?
Choose one workable action in your situation, review the experience and let it inform the next choice.